There was a time when I couldn’t breathe unless someone told me I was doing okay.
It sounds dramatic now, but back then it was my reality.
Every compliment felt like oxygen, every silence felt like rejection.
And I built a whole version of myself around that — the dependable one, the achiever, the guy who always has it together.
But the thing about leaning on others for validation is… you don’t notice how heavy it’s gotten until they walk away.
And one day they do. They always do — not out of malice, just life. People drift, situations change.
And you’re left standing there wondering — who am I when there’s no one left to clap?
I used to think being strong meant being surrounded.
Friends, mentors, attention, noise — anything to fill the space inside me that I didn’t want to face.
But when all that fell quiet, I had to meet myself for the first time — and honestly, it was awkward as hell.
I didn’t know how to sit with myself without needing to explain or justify or fix.
That silence was uncomfortable.
But slowly… it became something else.
It became familiar.
I remember one night, sitting by the window of my apartment in Dubai.
The city was buzzing — cars, lights, life moving fast.
But inside, I felt still. Not peaceful, not yet — just still.
And I realised, maybe that’s where it starts.
Not with some grand awakening, but a quiet acceptance — I’m here. I’m okay. Even if no one’s watching.
That was my first moment of self-trust.
Not fireworks. Just stillness.
I didn’t become my own anchor overnight.
It wasn’t a quote or a breakthrough or a therapy session.
It was smaller things — keeping promises I made to myself.
Showing up to the gym even when no one cared.
Writing without posting.
Saying no without explaining.
Letting people misunderstand me and not rushing to fix it.
You start to realise — the less you chase validation, the freer you feel.
You stop needing the applause because you’re finally okay with the silence.
But let me be honest — being your own anchor doesn’t mean you stop needing people.
It just means you stop depending on them to keep you steady.
You learn to love from wholeness, not from emptiness.
You show up because you want to, not because you need to.
And when life shakes you — because it will — you don’t collapse. You sway. You adjust. You breathe.
You remember that peace was never meant to come from control. It comes from trust.
These days, when things get messy (and they do), I remind myself:
You’ve been here before.
You’ve survived worse.
You know how to come back home to yourself.
I don’t always get it right.
Some days I still crave the noise, the validation, the feeling of being seen.
But more often than not, I find it within now.
And that — that’s freedom.
✨ Closing Reflection
If you’ve been trying to be everything for everyone, maybe this is your reminder to be something for yourself.
You don’t have to be unshakable — just anchored enough to return when the waves come.
Because they will.
And when they do, you’ll find yourself whispering — I’ve got me this time.
Mindful Musings 